Our twitter Friend @endless_Skye recently live tweeted re-watching the Saga. She decided to go Machete order and I thought it was funny and should share it with you today, on the premiere of the new installment The Force Awakens.
A New Hope
I’m gonna live tweet the fuck out of Star Wars. Because this is basically me watching it for the 1st time since I don’t remember much of it.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
Okay, but why would you ask questions after you’ve already choked the dude, Vader? — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
Obi Wan chops the guy’s arm off and the bar doesn’t even give a fuck.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
I don’t know who this cloaked figure is that’s following them, but it looks like he has a penis for a nose. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
“Better her than me!” – Han Solo, the epitome of chivalry
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
These stormtroopers are idiots. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
OBI-WAN THIS IS A FIGHT NOT A DANCE.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
I’m sorry, but Luke is kind of annoying. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
WTF, R2-D2 doesn’t get a medal?! Droids matter, too.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
Empire Strikes Back
Episode 5, Luke vs. The Abominable Snowman — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
THAT’S YOUR BROTHER, EW.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
“Those AT&Ts are beast.” “You mean AT-ATs.” “…AT&Ts” #BattleofHoth — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
Crazy, Yoda is. Laughing my ass off, I am.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
“I love you.” “I know.” Me: ? — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
THIS IS IT. Luke vs. Vader
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
Attack of the Clones
Wait, I lied. Apparently we are doing machete order and watching episode 2 now. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
For those still with me, machete order is Episodes 4, 5, 2, 3, and 6.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 1, 2015
Dude, did Obi-Wan just get shown up by a kid? “The planet was erased from the archive.”
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Okay, Anakin is being totally creepy with Padme. Their scenes together make me uncomfortable. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
OMG LITTLE BOBA. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Aaaaand we’re back with the creepiest seduction ever. #AnakinPadme
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
WHAT IS SARUMAN DOING HERE?! — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
GODDAMN IT JAR JAR.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Jedi fight!!!! Yasssss. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Samuel L. Jackson just laid the smack down on Boba’s dad.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Of course Anakin would pull a Leroy Jenkins. — Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Revenge of the Sith
Anakin and Padme are only slightly less creepy in episode 3.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Okay, but why did the Jedi tell Anakin to work with the chancellor if they suspect something is up with both of them?!
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
REALLY ANAKIN? How many red flags do you need?!
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
GODDAMNIT ANAKIN WHY DIDN’T YOU LISTEN TO SAMUEL L. JACKSON?!
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
NOT SAMUEL L. JACKSON! ?????
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Anakin is officially dead to me.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
So did the chancellor just pull the name Vader out of his ass or what?
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
WHAT IS HAPPENING?! THIS IS SO UPSETTING.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
“Anakin’s the father, isn’t he?” Aaaaand Obi-Wan finally catches up with the rest of us.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Only a sith deals in absolutes.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
OMG EPIC BATTLES.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
“Watch me twirl my light saber!” – Obi-Wan versus Anakin
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
“NOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Episode 3 has emotionally compromised me.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Return of the Jedi
Well, might as well finish this off with episode 6.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
I bet Jabba is smoking the good shit.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Luke plans a daring escape from the giant Venus fly trap.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
This Ewok is about as paranoid as I am.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
The Ewoks are vicious little fucks. I like that.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
IT’S A TRAP.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Han, you idiot. It’s her brother. Calm your tits.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
PARTY WITH THE EWOKS.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015
Well, I did it. I live tweeted the Star Wars series in a single day. I need a break to process all this.
— Skye (@Endless__Skye) November 2, 2015